The most requested thing for dinner around here? Noodles. With butter.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

The beverage cart

If I designed an airplane, the first thing I would NOT include would be the ubiquitous beverage cart.
It's just not needed.
The minute the captain turns off the seat belt sign and you think you are clear to stand, stretch, and maybe use the tiny restroom... WHAM! The beverage cart is in your way.
What does the beverage cart do? It brings you free miniscule amounts of your favorite cola, coffee, juice, or water. It sells you your prefered adult beverage. It is large and it gets in the way. It is just not needed.
No one really NEEDS coffee, juice, colas or beer on a flight. They will live without those drinks. Water is good because flying dries you out, but the rest are superfluous niceties that just are not needed.
On my airline, every seat would have a cupholder and bottles of water would be there waiting for you as you took your seat. No beverage cart needed. Without the beverage cart, there would be room for more seats on the plane. More seats would be a good thing.

My airplane would also not have any "first class" seats. All seats would be the same- and there would be a bit more leg room than the coach class has currently. First class seats are not that much more comfortable than coach, and everyone gets to their destination at the same time. If they had an airplane that was incredibly fast, THAT would be worth paying first class prices. But they don't. Also, the seats in my plane would not recline. It never fails that the person in front of me HAS to have that inch and a half of extra space, thus messing with everything I had on my tray table. You can live without reclining. No reclining.

On my airline, no little bags of peanuts or pretzels. I would have my flight attendant hand out apples. Apples are good. They work for those who are vegan, diabetic, kosher, lactose intolerant, allergic to nuts, and gluten free. They are just good- and they support the economy of my state. No annoying bags of trash when you are finished with an apple- just a biodegradeable core. Green. Very green.

So, who wants to fly with me?